Pretending's So Comfortable
by Tillyalf427
Summary: When Ikuya faints during swim practice, Natsuya and the others find out a lot more than they bargained for... Based off episode 2 of Free! Dive to the future


**A/N: Yo I made Ikuya suffer again...whoops...I also kinda failed at a platonic relationship but oh well. Also episode 3 has just given me even more ideas like this so I might write more around this sort of theme/ topic I dunno yet**

 **Also trigger warning for mentions of an eating disorder please do not read this if you think it will negatively affect you**

"Man Haru really is amazing," Asahi's voice spoke, causing Ikuya to turn his head to Asahi. "He apparently beat his personal best time again," He continued. Once he had finished speaking, Ikuya took his position and got ready to dive into the water

 _Right, I need to get stronger too..._

He pushed himself to swim faster than usual, feeling the burning in both his muscles and his lungs.

"Ikuya's working really hard today," Makoto commented, a hint of concern in his voice

"Yeah," Haru replied, staring intently at where Ikuya was still swimming.

"Okay, practice is over! Everyone cool down!" Natsuya's voice sounded out loudly, accompanied by a clap of his hands.

Makoto was still focussed on Ikuya who had now stopped and was talking to Asahi.

"Ikuya, practice is over," Asahi said once the other boy reached the end of the pool. Ikuya had a strange look in his eyes which concerned Asahi. He knew that Ikuya wouldn't tell him if something was wrong however he still asked;

"What's with you?" concern lacing his voice, something that Ikuya wasn't familiar with.

Ikuya looked away immediately and replied in between heavy breaths

"Nothing. I'm going to swim a little more," Ikuya swam off without giving Asahi the chance to reply.

"Hey!" Asahi tried to get Ikuya's attention as he swam off however, he was already too far to hear at that point. Asahi began making his way over to Haru and Makoto, immediately asking them if they knew what was wrong with Ikuya

As he swam, Ikuya slowly let his thoughts take over his head, using pure muscle memory to continue swimming.

 _Stronger...I have to get even stronger...Like Haru..._

Memories filled Ikuya's head as he swam however, they were fuzzy and he was unable to concentrate on them properly. His head felt heavy and he could see black spots in the corners of his vision. He didn't know what was going on but he was sure it couldn't be good.

 _I feel so...heavy..._

With that last thought, his vision went almost completely black and he slowly began sinking, unaware of his surroundings.

There was a chorus of surprised gasps and concerned shouts of Ikuya's name as the boy went under the water and didn't re-emerge. Haru didn't even think before he was diving into the pool, swimming as fast as possible towards Ikuya

"Haru!" someone shouted however, Haru couldn't spare the time to hear who it was as he rushed to try and get to Ikuya.

Ikuya thought he saw Haru swimming towards him however, he blamed it on his imagination as he slipped into unconsciousness.

Haru quickly grabbed the boy who felt way too light to be normal and began swimming back up to the surface before making his way to the side of the pool. Natsuya was waiting at the side of the pool, lifting Ikuya out of Haru's arms and onto the floor.

"Nao, could you call an ambulance?" Natsuya asked, checking Ikuya's pulse and his breathing, relieved to find that he could still feel both of them albeit faint and hard to notice.

"Everyone go home, I'll handle this," Natsuya said to the group of people waiting around him anxiously. At Natsuya's command, they all began making their way towards the changing rooms, minus Haru, Makoto, Asahi and Nao

"Is he going to be alright?" Makoto asked nervously. Natsuya gave him a small smile and began talking

"He should be, he's still breathing and I can still feel his pulse, that's a good sign,"

"Why was he so light? He didn't weigh anything..." Haru asked skeptically

"Glad to know I'm not the only one who noticed that but honestly, I'm not sure...I have an idea but I don't want to mention it in case it's not true..." Natsuya looked down at Ikuya who's head was resting on Natsuya's leg as he ran his hands through his hair gently. Nao walked off for a brief moment and returned with a towel and Natsuya's jacket.

"Here, dry him off a bit so that he doesn't get cold," He passed the two items to Natsuya who set to work

"He looks so small." Asahi commented after Natsuya had finished maneuvering Ikuya to put his jacket on him. The small boy was currently being drowned by the fabric and it made Natsuya smile with fondness.

Soon after, the sound of sirens sounded out and less than a minute later they could see the flashing of the lights as it parked up near the school. A group of paramedics came to move Ikuya into the ambulance and ask a few questions about what happened.

The ambulance left soon after and all five boys ran to the changing rooms, getting changed as quickly as possible before setting off towards the hospital they had taken Ikuya to.

Once they reached the hospital, they were asked to wait for a bit before they could see Ikuya, at this time, Natsuya called his parents to tell them what had happened. He got back at the same time as the doctor came out of Ikuya's room.

"He's going to be okay. He's still asleep but you can go and see him if you'd like. I would like to speak to him once he wakes up so if you could tell one of the nurses if he wakes up, that would be appreciated," After this, the doctor left and the five boys made their way into Ikuya's room.

It wasn't long after they entered the room that Ikuya's eyes began opening slowly, blinking rapidly as he got used to the bright light of the hospital room. Everything was fuzzy and he couldn't focus on anything for a few minutes however, from their voices, he could tell that the first person to hug him was Asahi who shouted something about him being awake.

"Thank goodness!" Makoto said as he joined in the hug. Ikuya normally wasn't one to accept hugs but his confusion about the situation justified it.

He looked around confused, seeing Natsuya, Nao and Haru stood around. Before he could voice his confusion though, Natsuya spoke up

"You're in the hospital. You nearly drowned from lack of oxygen," He didn't sound impressed which made Ikuya look down at his hands, curling in on himself slightly. Relief washed over him as Asahi and Makoto loosened their hold on him.

"Haru dove in and saved you!" Makoto said excitedly

"Yeah," Haru agreed, not knowing what else to say

"Oh..." Ikuya couldn't help but feel bad about everything that had happened. This was his fault, they could all be at home right now if it wasn't for him...

"Look, this happened because you pushed yourself too hard to swim with no breaks! A few seconds more and you could have died!" This time Natsuya sounded angry, not just concerned and it scared Ikuya. The last thing he'd ever wanted was to disappoint his brother, in fact, the complete opposite, everything he had done, he did it for Natsuya. He had messed up big time, and now he had to deal with the consequences

"Natsuya, don't be so hard on him," Nao said gently. Ikuya glanced up at Nao before looking down at his hands again

"I'm sorry..." He mumbled before looking directly at Haru "Thanks Haru,"

"It's okay, I'm glad you're alright," Haru had a small smile on his face, almost unnoticeable.

"They're keeping you here for a while to be on the safe side. Never do anything that reckless again!" The look on Natsuya's face looked like one of anger which unnerved Ikuya, he didn't think Natsuya would be this angry about it and it scared him slightly "The doctor wants to talk to you as well now that you've woken up, I'll go and get him" Natsuya left the room and Nao followed, leaving Haru, Makoto, and Asahi with a slightly scared Ikuya.

"Ikuya? Are you alright?" Makoto was the first to notice the shaking of Ikuya's hands

"Y..yeah, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" Ikuya appeared to shrink into himself even more at the question

"He's not actually angry at you Ikuya, He's just worried. He cares about you and doesn't want you to get hurt," Asahi tried to help make Ikuya feel better but it didn't appear to work

"I just...tried to be better but it still wasn't enough..." Ikuya was mumbling now, not intending for the others to hear, just talking to himself

"Ah, Ikuya, you're awake," The doctor entered the room, holding a clipboard in one hand and a pen in the other " Excuse me, could I please talk to Ikuya alone?" The doctor turned to the other three boys who nodded and left the room.

"So Ikuya, I'm sure you already know that the reason you're here is that you almost drowned?" To this, Ikuya nodded and the doctor continued "We're going to keep you in for a couple of days partly to monitor you to make sure nothing is wrong and partly because we're going to need to put you on an IV to give your body the nutrients it needs. I have to ask you, have you been eating properly over the past few weeks?"

Ikuya tensed up at the question. Of course, this would be mentioned. He was stupid...

Ikuya couldn't answer so instead he just shook his head.

"And has this been voluntarily not eating or not eating for a reason, for example, an illness?" The doctor questioned once more, giving Ikuya a sympathetic smile as he choked out a quiet

"Voluntarily..."

"Okay, it's okay, it's actually fairly common. We'll help to set you up with a counselor who can help you with this and we should be able to control it before it becomes life-threatening as it's still in the early stages yet. I am going to have to tell your brother about this but your friends don't need to know unless you want them to, is that okay?" The doctor continued, receiving a nod from Ikuya. With that, the doctor left the room and Haru, Makoto and Asahi re-entered the room.

Natsuya had been walking around for around ten minutes now. He knew he shouldn't have gotten that angry and he shouldn't have shouted at Ikuya however he had just been so concerned about the younger that his anger took control.

"I just made him feel like shit for something he couldn't control...Wow, I'm literally the worst..."

"You're not the worst Natsuya, you were just scared and concerned." Nao's soothing voice said from behind him "You know this as much as Ikuya does,"

"I yelled at him for trying to be better Nao, that's not being scared or concerned that's being an asshole," Natsuya turned away fromNao and began walking back towards Ikuya's room

"Then admit that. Go in there, tell him you were an asshole and apologize, and I guarantee it will all work out," Nao suggested

"But..." Natsuya began only to be cut off by Nao

"No buts, I'll take the others home," He left no room for arguments as he went into the room to retrieve the other three boys

Whilst Nao was gone, The doctor approached Natsuya, explaining that Ikuya had begun to develop an eating disorder. At the doctor's explanation of Ikuya not eating, Natsuya felt even worse. Natsuya saw Haru, Makoto and Asahi leave with Nao and saw the pointed look that Nao sent him. He stood up, preparing himself to face his actions as he made his way into Ikuya's room

Ikuya had his eyes closed again when Natsuya entered the room and the small boy flinched and opened his eyes as Natsuya sat down gently next to him.

"I'm sorry Natsuya...I ...I was stupid and I know I shouldn't have pushed myslef too hard..and..." Ikuya was cut off by Natsuya shushing him with a finger on his lips as he began to speak himself

"No, I'm the one that should e saying sorry, I shouldn't have gotten so mad at you before when you couldn't help what happened,"

"I just wanted to get better..." Ikuya said quieter before continuing in an almost silent voice "I wanted you to be proud of me..." He could feel tears building up in his eyes but was determined not to cry. He'd already caused enough problems...

"Oh, Ikuya...I am proud of you, so so proud of you...And you will get better, you are getting better, but this isnt the way to go about it, if you overtrain you could injure yourself," Natsuya leaned down to hug Ikuya, placing a gentle kiss on his hair covered forehead. Natsuya began stroking a gentle hand through ikuya's hair once again before asking

"Do you want to talk about this eating disorder now or not, I know you're supposed to be seeing a counselor but I know you, You're more likely to share things with people you're close to...I don't really know what I'm trying to say here, I guess I'm just saying if you want to talk, I'm always here to listen..." Natsuya awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck as he became flustered from his attempt at making sense. Ikuya averted his eyes to the ceiling past Natsuya's head before saying

"I guess I just wanted to be better again, and somethingI saw once said about this and then it became a bit of a habit before I could stop it...I didn't mean for it to go very far..."

"Shhh, It's okay, I understand. You don't need to justify it, I know things like this can be addicting. I'm just glad that we found out now and can try to help you before it gets any worse," Natsuya gave Ikuya a warm smile "You should try and get some sleep," Ikuya nodded and a yawn escaped his mouth at the mention of sleep causing Natsuya to let out a laugh

"Will you stay with me?" Ikuya asked innocently, his eyes wide as he looked up at Natsuya

"Of course," Natsuya replied before Ikuya pulled him to lie down next to him with surprising strength. Natsuya let out a laugh before quietly saying

"I love you, please never change," At this Ikuya smiled and wrapped himself around Natsuya who was now led down next to him

"I love you too..." He mumbled before he fell asleep. Natsuya continued stroking his hair until he too fell asleep.


End file.
